Some poems for you;

So here are a collection of poems I've written. Some old, some new. Tell me what you think!

8/16/11
 I don't want to be loved, I want to inspire love.
I want to be a necessity for love,
Essential and desired.

8/16/11
I just want to experience this life.
No more holding me back.
I'm diving into this world alone.
It could end tragically,
Or wonderfully.
But here I come world.
Fate will find my home
in this unforgiving,
yet beautiful place.
I may not make it alive,
But I'll have truly lived.


That was some older stuff i recently stumbled upon, but here are some of my new pieces. Which do you like better?

7/30/12
You were only here
From sunrise to sunset.
Yet I wish it was
Summer to spring,
and again.
Summer to spring.

Your words fade each day,
And the distance between us
grows longer.
The absence stronger.

I wish you were here with me,
Today.
But you've been gone so long.
So many things left to say,
But you're nowhere near to hear.

I loved you, but
I don't think you loved me.
I want to love again,
But my love for you won't let me.


This is my favorite that I've written in awhile;
7/30/12

Today was a day,
where your oceans turned dark.
The cool blue pierced me,
chilled me deep into my restless soul.

The warmth of your sun,
is absent.
The warmth of my love,
is fading.

Dark days are passing,
and a cold rain touches my face.
All I want is for your love,
your love to come back again.

The emptiness I feel,
compares to the blackest of all the night skies.
Stars of hope glimmer in existence,
but the sun.

It always rises.

First look,

So I've never posted one of my original poems on here, so I thought. Why the heck not! Well here it goes, tell me what you think!

First Look

The earth spins, but sometimes your own world stops.
One breath takes years,
One step, a lifetime.

A pulse starts strong in your chest.
Moves through your veins, piercing the soul.
Another step, another lifetime.

A lurking destination;
temptation to run, instinct to flee.
Then that severed soul awakens,
clawing to the surface of the skin.

It begs for liberation,
It cries for the deepest of desires.
It screams for you.

It craves your touch, your kiss,
the absolute rawest emotions of your being.

But once again the soul is silenced.
Pushed under layers and layers of
self destruction and bitter anger.

One day that world will stop again.
And that soul will be fulfilled.
Until that day it remains caged.
Protected from the truth of my world.

Life's Choices

In every person's life, there comes a time where you need to make decisions despite the emotional toll it may have on you. And while some may argue life gets easier with age, they're wrong. Life gets easier for the people who take the easy way out. Who don't admit the truth to themselves, and who ultimately live among numerous regrets that in turn haunt them forever. While their lives may be easy, they sure are not happy. When you meet someone, it is all about timing. For the most part, if timing is off then it is most likely not meant to be. You'll feel reluctant and hesitant to continue with the relationship, and that is the ultimate sign that it's over. When you're in love, there is no question. You won't care about meeting someone else, or sacrificing your dreams for that person. That is "the end of life as you know it," and no one should be able to change that. So when looking for love, realize that you deserve that person that ruins you for all others. Never settle because you fear loneliness; happiness never stems out of fear. So take risks, make mistakes. Let go if you're unsure about someone. I've once heard that absence makes the heart grow fonder; and if that's true I know of someone who will be waiting for me to make some more mistakes with.

What Love Can Do

Everyone has heard about this thing called "love," but when asked to define it...what does one say? Love is specific to each person who feels it. Love can mean sacrifice, it can mean desire. It could mean as much as a lifetime together or as little as one kiss. It has no limits, no boundaries. You can't tell love no, and you can't tell it to leave. It is something you learn to live with, even if you don't live with that person. I've grown to learn that love fades over time, but it will always tear at certain strings in your heart; reminding you of the past and giving you a glimpse of what you once had. While love can mean heartbreak, it most importantly means hope. When I think of loving someone, I think of my future. A lifetime spent in bliss and romance; building a family off of love. Love can make you crazy, but in the end love is what makes life go on.

Liberation

Why is it that every time I get back to normal or my mind becomes at ease, something comes along and messes it all up again! I mean not that it's a bad thing this time; finally. I'm so tired of feeling sad or sorry for myself. So now I'm taking charge of my life. No longer will I let anyone walk on me or ruin my day or week. I'm finally getting comfortable in my own skin. Instead of fearing the future, I now look forward with excitement. No longer will I be confined in the walls I've built around myself that have restricted me for so many years... What a liberating experience! Talking to some of my future college classmates has made me come to the realization that I'm not going to be alone. That there are actually plenty of people out there in the world that share my belief and values. While it was ignorant of me before to think that I would be alone, I've reassured myself of the truth that I won't. I know some of my blog followers aren't at this point in their lives; where you're leaving home and starting your independent life...but that doesn't mean you should wait until then to find yourself. It didn't happen for me until now, but honestly, that was entirely too long. For the past three years, I feared loving and living, and I didn't trust my heart with anyone. Don't put yourself through that. Life is about learning. We all make mistakes so don't restrict yourself from something in fear of making a mistake. But most importantly, never let anyone tell you that you are too young to fall in love. Love is timeless. Love is ageless. No one but you can dictate what your heart feels. So get out there, live your life. What's stopping you?

Can't Take This.

I can't take this anymore, there's just too much pain to be able to withstand. There is a hole burning through my chest where my heart once existed. I don't understand how it came to this...I guess I've done this to myself. I pushed you away when I was weak, and now I guess I'll have to pay for that. I'm so sorry for everything; I was wrong. I thought I was branching out and growing up so I no longer needed you. But that was when I really needed you the most. I want someone to share my life with. Without someone to talk to, everything I do is meaningless. My accomplishments feel empty and worthless. I never wanted to hurt you, but I guess I did. Please just listen to me when I say that I still love you. I never stopped loving you. And I don't know if I ever will. I don't think you feel the same way anymore, but I understand that. I had a chance and I blew it. I don't deserve you..no you're too good for me. I was broken before I met you and I carried that along with me. It was my fault for us ending, and now I'm paying the price for that. Whenever you need a friend, I'll be there for you. I'm not going anywhere and please remember that. As for me, I'll always be broken. There will always be a little piece of emptiness that lives inside of me. But I know that no matter what, I'll never be alone. I am God's child and he loves me no matter the mistakes I've made, or the paths that I should've, but have not taken. So I suppose this is goodbye for now, but I'll never be able to say goodbye forever.

Just Waiting.

I'm sitting in the library during study hall right now and my mind can't rest. I can't help but think how none of this is what I really want. And right now I feel stuck. Stuck in the life I've created for myself. The more I reflect on the person I am, the more I realize that I'm the only one standing in the way of the person I want to be. I always feel so alone, so isolated from everyone and I've never really understood why. But I think I'm starting to figure it out; I'm the one pulling away. I'm pulling away from the life I've made because I know it isn't truly a hundred percent who I am. Yet I fail to express the person that really exists inside of me because I'm scared to admit who that person is. I'm afraid I won't be accepted, but mostly I'm afraid that I'll never be loved. And in my fear I'm creating this wall. This indestructible barrier that is slowly withdrawing me further and further away from reality. I'm just starting my adult life and I can't afford to live it any other way than being true to myself. We only get one shot at this whole thing, and I don't want to screw it up and live a life full of regrets. From this point on, I free myself from living life as a coward. I need to break out; I need to live. I want to experience so much of the world and that's never going to happen if I don't believe in myself. I need not be afraid of the what ifs in life, but to embrace all of life's certainties and thrive off of them. And one thing I will always know is that God will accompany me through my life. Through my mistakes and triumphs; I'll never be alone. So I have this to say to my readers; Please keep your head high and your dreams alive. No one can put a limit on you besides yourself. Remember that you're beautiful and you will never walk this Earth alone. Find the confidence in yourself to break out of your shell. Live life, laugh a lot, and enjoy this beautiful world that surrounds you everyday.